CMS 315 EXAM 2 VERIFIED STUDY GUIDE
Revelation (Characteristics of Enduring Relationships ) - Answers - you tell your partner
things you wouldn't normally tell other people.
Meshing (Characteristics of Enduring Relationships) - Answers - You come together
quite comfortably, like putting your hands together. Example: Both religious people, both
love frisbee
mutually interdependent (Characteristics of Enduring Relationships) - Answers - We
need each other. We integrate roles, and we don't conflict on those things. The use of
pronouns "we", "our", etc.
Anxiety Reduction (Characteristics of Enduring Relationships) - Answers - When bad
things happen, we need our partner. Like when your dog leaves you, someone steals
your bike. You're able to go home to your parents house. Feeling safe.
Proximity (Characteristics of Enduring Relationships) - Answers - spends lots of time
close together. Physical proximity and emotional proximity.
Relationships as Systematic (Characteristics of Enduring Relationships) - Answers -
"Adding another child changes relationships". Anytime you make a change to a
relationship, everything changes.
Ritual & Reciprocity (Characteristics of Enduring Relationships) - Answers - every
couple has rituals. When you raise your hand to stretch, you know he's going to put it
around her. We always celebrate certain rituals, like deaths, and little things. Every
relationship needs rituals. When you make a move, someone reciprocates it.
Intimacy (Characteristics of Enduring Relationships) - Answers - Comfort with intimacy.
Families that shower with the door open, or locked. Wearing each other's clothes.
History (Characteristics of Enduring Relationships) - Answers - Scrapbooking. Keeping
old photos to look at. Couples need a history too, you want to experience together. We
are closer with siblings that we are closer in age with because of our history together.
Self-expansion (Characteristics of Enduring Relationships) - Answers - you make each
other better. You also become different people because of your partner.
idealization vs. realization (Relational Contradictions) - Answers - When you present an
ideal self, and then it's a problem to present your real self.
Dependent vs. Independence (Relational Contradictions) - Answers - you want to be
independent, but you also want a life with your partner
,Optimality vs. Satisfaction (Relational Contradictions) - Answers - We all want perfect
but we have to live with what we can get.
Momentum & Trajectory (Characteristics of Enduring Relationships) - Answers - Talking
about the future of your relationship. "In the end we'll do this together..." Planning to
graduate college.
Honesty vs. Dishonesty (Relational Contradictions) - Answers - We want honesty, but
sometimes it's okay to be dishonest for politeness and other reasons.
Altruism vs. Selfishness (Relational Contradictions) - Answers - Every relationship you
do good stuff for your partner, and expect something in return
Privacy vs. Openness (Relational Contradictions) - Answers - Some people are okay
with their partner checking their text messages, and some are not okay with it.
Happiness vs. Non-happiness (Relational Contradictions) - Answers - The opposite of
being happy is not being unhappy, but just having non-happiness. There are just some
days where are not feeling anything.
Attention vs. Smothering (Relational Contradictions) - Answers - We want attention from
our partner, but also want space from them. We need our time and space.
Hope vs. Acceptance (Relational Contradictions) - Answers - you want good things for
you and your partner, but sometimes you just have to say "that's just the way it is." One
of your parents ended up getting fat.
Love vs. Comfort (Relational Contradictions) - Answers - Love is different over time.
Parents can become good roommates instead of being in love with each other.
Dispositional Shyness - Answers - a person who is always shy, no matter the location.
Effects all personality traits.
Situational Shyness - Answers - everyone of us has shyness at some point. Depends
on certain situation.
Educational (Dispositional Correlates) - Answers - it effects you from the time you are a
small child. Reading out loud is not a determinant of skill. You can be a really good at
reading but quiet and they think you're not as good.
Occupational (Dispositional Correlates) - Answers - shy people don't get as well of
paying jobs. Because of interview process.
Relational (Dispositional Correlates) - Answers - Shy people don't think people like them
because they are more harsh on themselves. A difference in self assessment. Shy
people are less likely to return things.
, Genetics (Cause of dispositional shyness) - Answers - good evidence that shyness is
genetic. Identical twins are more alike.
Punishment (Reinforcement Model) - Answers - people become shy because they get
punished for speaking. You get beat up everytime you talk
Non-responsiveness (Reinforcement Model) - Answers - when you talk and you don't
get a response, you get forgotten and you become more shy. Just getting ignored.
Learned Helplessness (Reinforcement Model) - Answers - I give up and I say "what's
the use" think dog treat machine example.
Skills (cause of dispositional shyness) - Answers - people with more skills tend to be
less shy. People are shy because they don't know how to behave at a certain event.
Modeling (cause of dispositional shyness) - Answers - you may not have had any good
communication models. Show kids playing kids together to kids with social phobias and
they start to play. Watching people kiss.
Systematic desensitization (Behavioral Therapy to reduce shyness) - Answers - relaxing
someone and then telling them about occasions until they associate nervousness with
relaxation
Cognitive restructuring (Behavioral Therapy to reduce shyness) - Answers - you are shy
because you have unrealistic expectations. Challenging an irrational fear
Visualization (Behavioral Therapy to reduce shyness) - Answers - golfers visualize the
course before. They have found it's just as effective as physically practicing.
Skills Training (To overcome shyness) - Answers - I can give you skills to overcome
shyness.
Conspicuousness (Causes of Situational Shyness) - Answers - talking to one person vs
a mass audience. You are nervous when you think you are the center of attention
Rigid Rules (Causes of Situational Shyness) - Answers - having too many rules and
letting them run you instead of you running them. They trap you.
Labels (Causes of Situational Shyness) - Answers - labeling fear and excitement
differently. People just label themselves.
Evaluation (Causes of Situational Shyness) - Answers - you tend to be more shy when
you think people are judging you
Revelation (Characteristics of Enduring Relationships ) - Answers - you tell your partner
things you wouldn't normally tell other people.
Meshing (Characteristics of Enduring Relationships) - Answers - You come together
quite comfortably, like putting your hands together. Example: Both religious people, both
love frisbee
mutually interdependent (Characteristics of Enduring Relationships) - Answers - We
need each other. We integrate roles, and we don't conflict on those things. The use of
pronouns "we", "our", etc.
Anxiety Reduction (Characteristics of Enduring Relationships) - Answers - When bad
things happen, we need our partner. Like when your dog leaves you, someone steals
your bike. You're able to go home to your parents house. Feeling safe.
Proximity (Characteristics of Enduring Relationships) - Answers - spends lots of time
close together. Physical proximity and emotional proximity.
Relationships as Systematic (Characteristics of Enduring Relationships) - Answers -
"Adding another child changes relationships". Anytime you make a change to a
relationship, everything changes.
Ritual & Reciprocity (Characteristics of Enduring Relationships) - Answers - every
couple has rituals. When you raise your hand to stretch, you know he's going to put it
around her. We always celebrate certain rituals, like deaths, and little things. Every
relationship needs rituals. When you make a move, someone reciprocates it.
Intimacy (Characteristics of Enduring Relationships) - Answers - Comfort with intimacy.
Families that shower with the door open, or locked. Wearing each other's clothes.
History (Characteristics of Enduring Relationships) - Answers - Scrapbooking. Keeping
old photos to look at. Couples need a history too, you want to experience together. We
are closer with siblings that we are closer in age with because of our history together.
Self-expansion (Characteristics of Enduring Relationships) - Answers - you make each
other better. You also become different people because of your partner.
idealization vs. realization (Relational Contradictions) - Answers - When you present an
ideal self, and then it's a problem to present your real self.
Dependent vs. Independence (Relational Contradictions) - Answers - you want to be
independent, but you also want a life with your partner
,Optimality vs. Satisfaction (Relational Contradictions) - Answers - We all want perfect
but we have to live with what we can get.
Momentum & Trajectory (Characteristics of Enduring Relationships) - Answers - Talking
about the future of your relationship. "In the end we'll do this together..." Planning to
graduate college.
Honesty vs. Dishonesty (Relational Contradictions) - Answers - We want honesty, but
sometimes it's okay to be dishonest for politeness and other reasons.
Altruism vs. Selfishness (Relational Contradictions) - Answers - Every relationship you
do good stuff for your partner, and expect something in return
Privacy vs. Openness (Relational Contradictions) - Answers - Some people are okay
with their partner checking their text messages, and some are not okay with it.
Happiness vs. Non-happiness (Relational Contradictions) - Answers - The opposite of
being happy is not being unhappy, but just having non-happiness. There are just some
days where are not feeling anything.
Attention vs. Smothering (Relational Contradictions) - Answers - We want attention from
our partner, but also want space from them. We need our time and space.
Hope vs. Acceptance (Relational Contradictions) - Answers - you want good things for
you and your partner, but sometimes you just have to say "that's just the way it is." One
of your parents ended up getting fat.
Love vs. Comfort (Relational Contradictions) - Answers - Love is different over time.
Parents can become good roommates instead of being in love with each other.
Dispositional Shyness - Answers - a person who is always shy, no matter the location.
Effects all personality traits.
Situational Shyness - Answers - everyone of us has shyness at some point. Depends
on certain situation.
Educational (Dispositional Correlates) - Answers - it effects you from the time you are a
small child. Reading out loud is not a determinant of skill. You can be a really good at
reading but quiet and they think you're not as good.
Occupational (Dispositional Correlates) - Answers - shy people don't get as well of
paying jobs. Because of interview process.
Relational (Dispositional Correlates) - Answers - Shy people don't think people like them
because they are more harsh on themselves. A difference in self assessment. Shy
people are less likely to return things.
, Genetics (Cause of dispositional shyness) - Answers - good evidence that shyness is
genetic. Identical twins are more alike.
Punishment (Reinforcement Model) - Answers - people become shy because they get
punished for speaking. You get beat up everytime you talk
Non-responsiveness (Reinforcement Model) - Answers - when you talk and you don't
get a response, you get forgotten and you become more shy. Just getting ignored.
Learned Helplessness (Reinforcement Model) - Answers - I give up and I say "what's
the use" think dog treat machine example.
Skills (cause of dispositional shyness) - Answers - people with more skills tend to be
less shy. People are shy because they don't know how to behave at a certain event.
Modeling (cause of dispositional shyness) - Answers - you may not have had any good
communication models. Show kids playing kids together to kids with social phobias and
they start to play. Watching people kiss.
Systematic desensitization (Behavioral Therapy to reduce shyness) - Answers - relaxing
someone and then telling them about occasions until they associate nervousness with
relaxation
Cognitive restructuring (Behavioral Therapy to reduce shyness) - Answers - you are shy
because you have unrealistic expectations. Challenging an irrational fear
Visualization (Behavioral Therapy to reduce shyness) - Answers - golfers visualize the
course before. They have found it's just as effective as physically practicing.
Skills Training (To overcome shyness) - Answers - I can give you skills to overcome
shyness.
Conspicuousness (Causes of Situational Shyness) - Answers - talking to one person vs
a mass audience. You are nervous when you think you are the center of attention
Rigid Rules (Causes of Situational Shyness) - Answers - having too many rules and
letting them run you instead of you running them. They trap you.
Labels (Causes of Situational Shyness) - Answers - labeling fear and excitement
differently. People just label themselves.
Evaluation (Causes of Situational Shyness) - Answers - you tend to be more shy when
you think people are judging you
