Psychology of Sexuality
Lecture 1: Introduction. How and why do people have sex?
Hardware Biology
Operating system Evolution
Software Social environment and culture
Helpdesk Sexual problems-sexologist
Sex is part of our identity for most of the people.
The environment we grow up in tells us how to think of sex (culture, religion…).
Talking about sex is awkward but it’s all around us. When it comes to the human body
Facebook now struggles with censorship.
Most young people associate sex with positive things.
What is sex? Complex…
How do people have sex?
Not
- No sex (asexual people, they can still masturbate and have sexual fantasies, no
sexual drive and attraction ≠ allosexuality, in the middle we have grey sexuality
which means that people have vague sexual interest)
- Voluntary celibacy (choose not to have sex like priests, people that wait for
marriage, virgins, does not mean they are not happy, it can be complete or partial)
- Involuntary celibacy (generally experienced negatively, distance relationships,
divorced, institutional restrictions, nursing homes, physically unable, psychological
disability, your partner loses interest in sex, incels want sex but cannot find a
partner, white heterosexual males on online forums, they are characterized by
misogyny, self-pity and racism, they feel entitled to have sex)
Solitary sexual behaviors
- Sexual fantasies, conscious control of images. They differ between the sexes.
enhancement of sexual arousal, compensation for a less than ideal sexual situation,
and reduced sexual anxiety
- Masturbation, most people do it, men/young people/white people/people with
higher education do it more. It can reduce risks of prostate cancer in men. It is
proven to be healthy and can be part of a relationship. Masturbation can also be
unhealthy as it makes you aroused tunnel vision you take more risks
Partnered sexual behaviors (SEX IS ONLY SEX WHEN ALL PARTNERS CONSENT. IF
THERE IS NO CONSENT, WE CALL IT SEXUAL ASSAULT/SEXUAL ABUSE/RAPE. Age
gaps, partner unable to give consent, power disbalance)
, - Kissing, can promote health due to exchange of bacteria. It might originate from
monkeys.
- Touching, important in the sexual activities, caressing of erogenous body zones
- Manual sex (tribadism: touch of genitals)
- Oral sex, ¾ of people do it, more frequent around youngsters (fellatio and
cunnilingus)
- Anal sex, increasingly popular in youngsters and highly educated people, health risks
due to lack of lubrication (anilingus=licking of the anus)
- Vaginal intercourse (coitus)
4 basic positions:
1. Missionary
2. Cowgirl
3. From behind
4. Sideway
5. Also, CAT position
Women rarely orgasm without clitoris stimulation and it is even harder to achieve
simultaneous orgasm.
Sex is more than just coitus
The notion that real sex equals penetration of the vagina by the penis and placing this
particular sexual act as central to normal heterosex coital imperative
- Sex is all behavior that arouses us (touch, hearing, vision, smell)
- Mostly focused on genitals
- Often leads to orgasm
- Sex is only sex if all partners agree
, Lecture 2: Sex and culture: the role of religion and science
Why do people have sex?
For centuries the idea about sex has been:
- Heterosexual penis-vagina coitus
- Where the man has an orgasm
- Within a monogamous relationship (preferably marriage)
- With the aim of reproduction
Desires for other kinds of sexual activities have been frowned upon, considered unusual.
Biologists say that the goal of sex is mixing of genes and survival of the species. But that is a
result and not the motivation.
- Procreation: sex for reproduction (heterosexual coitus aimed to share genes)
- Recreation: sex for pleasure (it’s any behavior, solo or with a partner, focused on
satisfying sexual desire)
- Relation: sex to confirm an intimate relationship (focused on strengthening an
emotional bond)
Reasons:
- Physical (physical pleasure, attractiveness, curiosity)
- Goal attainment (promotions, burn calories, have a child)
- Emotional (increase emotional bond, show affection, express emotions)
- Insecurity (raise self-esteem, didn’t know how to say no, felt obligated)
Among other reasons are: wanting to have a child, it feels good, I was horny, wanting to
express your love for your partner, wanting to relieve menstrual cramps, to act out fantasies,
boredom, making up after a fight (make-up sex), feeling sorry for the other person (pity sex),
getting a promotion, boredom from the other partner
Men have more reasons centering appearance for having sex compared to women and
because of opportunities, availability etc. while women have more emotionally driven
reasons. However, there is not a great difference in their reasons.
For centuries Nowadays
Activity Penis-in-vagina Wide range or behaviors: mutual
intercourse masturbation,
oral/manual/vaginal/anal, sexting
phone sex etc.
Relationship Within the context of Variety: unmarried, heterosexual,
marriage homosexual, one-night stands
friends with benefits, serial
monogamy
Motivation For the purpose of Procreation, recreation, attraction,
procreation fun, affection…
Lecture 1: Introduction. How and why do people have sex?
Hardware Biology
Operating system Evolution
Software Social environment and culture
Helpdesk Sexual problems-sexologist
Sex is part of our identity for most of the people.
The environment we grow up in tells us how to think of sex (culture, religion…).
Talking about sex is awkward but it’s all around us. When it comes to the human body
Facebook now struggles with censorship.
Most young people associate sex with positive things.
What is sex? Complex…
How do people have sex?
Not
- No sex (asexual people, they can still masturbate and have sexual fantasies, no
sexual drive and attraction ≠ allosexuality, in the middle we have grey sexuality
which means that people have vague sexual interest)
- Voluntary celibacy (choose not to have sex like priests, people that wait for
marriage, virgins, does not mean they are not happy, it can be complete or partial)
- Involuntary celibacy (generally experienced negatively, distance relationships,
divorced, institutional restrictions, nursing homes, physically unable, psychological
disability, your partner loses interest in sex, incels want sex but cannot find a
partner, white heterosexual males on online forums, they are characterized by
misogyny, self-pity and racism, they feel entitled to have sex)
Solitary sexual behaviors
- Sexual fantasies, conscious control of images. They differ between the sexes.
enhancement of sexual arousal, compensation for a less than ideal sexual situation,
and reduced sexual anxiety
- Masturbation, most people do it, men/young people/white people/people with
higher education do it more. It can reduce risks of prostate cancer in men. It is
proven to be healthy and can be part of a relationship. Masturbation can also be
unhealthy as it makes you aroused tunnel vision you take more risks
Partnered sexual behaviors (SEX IS ONLY SEX WHEN ALL PARTNERS CONSENT. IF
THERE IS NO CONSENT, WE CALL IT SEXUAL ASSAULT/SEXUAL ABUSE/RAPE. Age
gaps, partner unable to give consent, power disbalance)
, - Kissing, can promote health due to exchange of bacteria. It might originate from
monkeys.
- Touching, important in the sexual activities, caressing of erogenous body zones
- Manual sex (tribadism: touch of genitals)
- Oral sex, ¾ of people do it, more frequent around youngsters (fellatio and
cunnilingus)
- Anal sex, increasingly popular in youngsters and highly educated people, health risks
due to lack of lubrication (anilingus=licking of the anus)
- Vaginal intercourse (coitus)
4 basic positions:
1. Missionary
2. Cowgirl
3. From behind
4. Sideway
5. Also, CAT position
Women rarely orgasm without clitoris stimulation and it is even harder to achieve
simultaneous orgasm.
Sex is more than just coitus
The notion that real sex equals penetration of the vagina by the penis and placing this
particular sexual act as central to normal heterosex coital imperative
- Sex is all behavior that arouses us (touch, hearing, vision, smell)
- Mostly focused on genitals
- Often leads to orgasm
- Sex is only sex if all partners agree
, Lecture 2: Sex and culture: the role of religion and science
Why do people have sex?
For centuries the idea about sex has been:
- Heterosexual penis-vagina coitus
- Where the man has an orgasm
- Within a monogamous relationship (preferably marriage)
- With the aim of reproduction
Desires for other kinds of sexual activities have been frowned upon, considered unusual.
Biologists say that the goal of sex is mixing of genes and survival of the species. But that is a
result and not the motivation.
- Procreation: sex for reproduction (heterosexual coitus aimed to share genes)
- Recreation: sex for pleasure (it’s any behavior, solo or with a partner, focused on
satisfying sexual desire)
- Relation: sex to confirm an intimate relationship (focused on strengthening an
emotional bond)
Reasons:
- Physical (physical pleasure, attractiveness, curiosity)
- Goal attainment (promotions, burn calories, have a child)
- Emotional (increase emotional bond, show affection, express emotions)
- Insecurity (raise self-esteem, didn’t know how to say no, felt obligated)
Among other reasons are: wanting to have a child, it feels good, I was horny, wanting to
express your love for your partner, wanting to relieve menstrual cramps, to act out fantasies,
boredom, making up after a fight (make-up sex), feeling sorry for the other person (pity sex),
getting a promotion, boredom from the other partner
Men have more reasons centering appearance for having sex compared to women and
because of opportunities, availability etc. while women have more emotionally driven
reasons. However, there is not a great difference in their reasons.
For centuries Nowadays
Activity Penis-in-vagina Wide range or behaviors: mutual
intercourse masturbation,
oral/manual/vaginal/anal, sexting
phone sex etc.
Relationship Within the context of Variety: unmarried, heterosexual,
marriage homosexual, one-night stands
friends with benefits, serial
monogamy
Motivation For the purpose of Procreation, recreation, attraction,
procreation fun, affection…
