That Ugly Neon Mat
I seriously needed to stop joining sports just because my friends were in
it. From track, to cross country to wrestling, I joined these after-school activities
as an excuse to “hang out”, which quickly became my main interest in life.
Wrestling was a blind choice-I had no prior experience in similar sports, and had
no idea what to expect from it. I, like most people, think of large, buff men being
thrown around, suplex throws and “Nacho Libre”. Not my 95 lbs 13 year old self
who jumped away when a sports ball was in the air, (an embarrassing habit in
gym class). But, after losing half my matches the first year, I loved the sport
more than anything. Joining the high school season was different though, half
my teammates dropping of concussions and broken bones, the 20+ matches a
month, and the unspoken fear that came with our daily weigh-ins. Girls wrestling
is the fastest growing sport in the U.S., and I have found myself entering my 4th
year as both a wrestler, and a referee.
Now, I don’t barely win half of my matches, but nearly all of them. I’ve lost
over and over, and learned from those matches-don’t let girls get in your head,
use your moves, not some move I learned the day before and it’s okay to lose
, quick, I made it to that match. I’m ranked top 11 in the state, even wrestling
there. By now, I have known the sizing of the ugly, neon hard mat without
looking, known the sound of the screeching whistle to start that made you jump,
even stuck the unconscious habit of scoping opponents during warm ups, every
wrestler has. Every girl knows the fear of stepping on a scale, the anxiety of
wrestling someone new, and the doubt when you make a simple mistake. Us
girls can all recall the sting in our hearts when our opponent’s hand is raised, the
horror when you find yourself being taken down without a way out. We also
know that around 1 in ten (from personal count) of us pass out every meet due
to insufficient nutrition in an attempt to “make weight”; I’ve seen ambulances
carry girls out at every meet, no matter what the size. This doesn’t happen at the
boy’s meets. My family and friends are shocked when they see this, like my past
self- they thought of wrestling as more masculine and with big moves- yes,
weighted but with little pressure to “make weight.”
There’s a language to every sport. For this, there are 3. The language of
moves- every takedown, pinning combination, reversal etc is called and known.
Then there's the language of health- concussion checks, skin checks for
ringworm, protein and carbs. Last, there’s the unspoken language. Nobody says
the words “Eating Disorder”. That’s too medical. Instead they say their “tricks” to
make weight. “Drink lots of water 2 days before, then no liquids 24 hours before
I seriously needed to stop joining sports just because my friends were in
it. From track, to cross country to wrestling, I joined these after-school activities
as an excuse to “hang out”, which quickly became my main interest in life.
Wrestling was a blind choice-I had no prior experience in similar sports, and had
no idea what to expect from it. I, like most people, think of large, buff men being
thrown around, suplex throws and “Nacho Libre”. Not my 95 lbs 13 year old self
who jumped away when a sports ball was in the air, (an embarrassing habit in
gym class). But, after losing half my matches the first year, I loved the sport
more than anything. Joining the high school season was different though, half
my teammates dropping of concussions and broken bones, the 20+ matches a
month, and the unspoken fear that came with our daily weigh-ins. Girls wrestling
is the fastest growing sport in the U.S., and I have found myself entering my 4th
year as both a wrestler, and a referee.
Now, I don’t barely win half of my matches, but nearly all of them. I’ve lost
over and over, and learned from those matches-don’t let girls get in your head,
use your moves, not some move I learned the day before and it’s okay to lose
, quick, I made it to that match. I’m ranked top 11 in the state, even wrestling
there. By now, I have known the sizing of the ugly, neon hard mat without
looking, known the sound of the screeching whistle to start that made you jump,
even stuck the unconscious habit of scoping opponents during warm ups, every
wrestler has. Every girl knows the fear of stepping on a scale, the anxiety of
wrestling someone new, and the doubt when you make a simple mistake. Us
girls can all recall the sting in our hearts when our opponent’s hand is raised, the
horror when you find yourself being taken down without a way out. We also
know that around 1 in ten (from personal count) of us pass out every meet due
to insufficient nutrition in an attempt to “make weight”; I’ve seen ambulances
carry girls out at every meet, no matter what the size. This doesn’t happen at the
boy’s meets. My family and friends are shocked when they see this, like my past
self- they thought of wrestling as more masculine and with big moves- yes,
weighted but with little pressure to “make weight.”
There’s a language to every sport. For this, there are 3. The language of
moves- every takedown, pinning combination, reversal etc is called and known.
Then there's the language of health- concussion checks, skin checks for
ringworm, protein and carbs. Last, there’s the unspoken language. Nobody says
the words “Eating Disorder”. That’s too medical. Instead they say their “tricks” to
make weight. “Drink lots of water 2 days before, then no liquids 24 hours before
