Lectures Interpersonal relations
Lecture 1: General introduction and building blocks of interpersonal
relations
Three different perspectives:
1. Evolutionary perspective;
2. Cultural perspective; norms and how people are expected to act
3. Individualistic perspective; in the self
‘no man is an island, entire of it self..’
- Because of internal, evolutionary drives that gear us toward
relationships
- Because our brains expect the world to be full of other people
- Because we are embedded in social relationships and conform to cultural rules about how to
relate with one another
Para-social interaction= a one-sided bond with a media figure.
Social baseline theory= relationships help us to be more free and safe. We
are able to be an individual because of the safe base that others give us. A
strong network allows you to be an individual because there is a strong
network to fall back on. Some people believe they can do it all themselves
and don’t need others.
(3) What is an interpersonal relationship
- Association between 2 or more people (close, casual, fleeting,
enduring)
- Exert diverse effects on one another over a period of time
- Casual relations are influential
But close intimate relationships tend to be the most influential
What is the nature of a close relationship
- Knowledge
- Caring
- Interdependence
- Mutuality
- Trust
- Commitment
Self-disclosure responsiveness
Types of close relationships;
- Friendship= voluntary interdependence between 2 persons over time, that is intended to
facilitate socio-emotional goals and my involve varying types/degrees of companionship,
intimacy, affection and mutual support
- Versus romantic relationships; fewer obligations, less emotionally intense, less exclusive
Relationships are important for health and well-being
, - Loneliness; discrepancy between number/quality relationships we want and actually have
- Health risks of loneliness:
Loneliness is as bad as smoking 15 cigarettes a day
Loneliness is worse for you than obesity
Lonely people are more likely to suffer from dementia, heart disease and depression
Loneliness is likely to increase your risk of death by 29%
Why does the quality of relationships have such consequences;
- Need to belong= human beings have a pervasive drive to form and maintain at least a
minimum quantity of lasting, positive and significant interpersonal relationships
- Best satisfied; frequent and pleasant interactions with a few close others
Our social nature;
- People form social bonds quickly and easily
- People are reluctant to break social bonds
- Social attachments exert substantial influence on how people think
- Social attachments are strongly associated with people’s emotional states
- Breaking of social bonds has significant negative consequences
Development/experience;
- Attachment theory (Bowlby)
Attachment styles have significant consequences for our close
relationships;
- Preoccupied attachment style: associated with hostile and
socially anxious peer relationships
- Secure attachment style: greater relationship
interdependence, commitment, trust and satisfaction
- Anxious and avoidant attachment styles: less frequent positive emotions; more frequent
negative emotions
Does contemporary attachment theory contradict the need to belong theory?
- Do people with an avoidant attachment style still a need to belong? They either don’t care,
or, they need that/want that. Even avoidant people like relations. There are more hurdles to
overcome than for secure people, but they can still make relationships work.
Attachment styles have significant consequences for our close relationships;
- Preoccupied attachment associated with hostile and socially anxious peer relationships
- The secure attachment style; greater relationship interdependence, commitment, trust and
satisfaction
Lecture 1: General introduction and building blocks of interpersonal
relations
Three different perspectives:
1. Evolutionary perspective;
2. Cultural perspective; norms and how people are expected to act
3. Individualistic perspective; in the self
‘no man is an island, entire of it self..’
- Because of internal, evolutionary drives that gear us toward
relationships
- Because our brains expect the world to be full of other people
- Because we are embedded in social relationships and conform to cultural rules about how to
relate with one another
Para-social interaction= a one-sided bond with a media figure.
Social baseline theory= relationships help us to be more free and safe. We
are able to be an individual because of the safe base that others give us. A
strong network allows you to be an individual because there is a strong
network to fall back on. Some people believe they can do it all themselves
and don’t need others.
(3) What is an interpersonal relationship
- Association between 2 or more people (close, casual, fleeting,
enduring)
- Exert diverse effects on one another over a period of time
- Casual relations are influential
But close intimate relationships tend to be the most influential
What is the nature of a close relationship
- Knowledge
- Caring
- Interdependence
- Mutuality
- Trust
- Commitment
Self-disclosure responsiveness
Types of close relationships;
- Friendship= voluntary interdependence between 2 persons over time, that is intended to
facilitate socio-emotional goals and my involve varying types/degrees of companionship,
intimacy, affection and mutual support
- Versus romantic relationships; fewer obligations, less emotionally intense, less exclusive
Relationships are important for health and well-being
, - Loneliness; discrepancy between number/quality relationships we want and actually have
- Health risks of loneliness:
Loneliness is as bad as smoking 15 cigarettes a day
Loneliness is worse for you than obesity
Lonely people are more likely to suffer from dementia, heart disease and depression
Loneliness is likely to increase your risk of death by 29%
Why does the quality of relationships have such consequences;
- Need to belong= human beings have a pervasive drive to form and maintain at least a
minimum quantity of lasting, positive and significant interpersonal relationships
- Best satisfied; frequent and pleasant interactions with a few close others
Our social nature;
- People form social bonds quickly and easily
- People are reluctant to break social bonds
- Social attachments exert substantial influence on how people think
- Social attachments are strongly associated with people’s emotional states
- Breaking of social bonds has significant negative consequences
Development/experience;
- Attachment theory (Bowlby)
Attachment styles have significant consequences for our close
relationships;
- Preoccupied attachment style: associated with hostile and
socially anxious peer relationships
- Secure attachment style: greater relationship
interdependence, commitment, trust and satisfaction
- Anxious and avoidant attachment styles: less frequent positive emotions; more frequent
negative emotions
Does contemporary attachment theory contradict the need to belong theory?
- Do people with an avoidant attachment style still a need to belong? They either don’t care,
or, they need that/want that. Even avoidant people like relations. There are more hurdles to
overcome than for secure people, but they can still make relationships work.
Attachment styles have significant consequences for our close relationships;
- Preoccupied attachment associated with hostile and socially anxious peer relationships
- The secure attachment style; greater relationship interdependence, commitment, trust and
satisfaction
