Psychology of Sexuality
May 2021
Lecture 1 - Introduction
Three perspectives on sexuality
1. Biological: we all have a body
2. Social and Cultural Psychological: we all grow up in a cultural and social set-
ting
3. Applied Clinical: a sexual relationship can go wrong
Sex - Computer metaphor
Hardware Biology
Operating system Evolution
Software Social environment and culture
Helpdesk Sexologist
Table 1: Sex - computer metaphore
Definitions
• Sex(uality): Sexuality is about all sensory perceptions, emotions and cogni-
tions that someone associates with physical sexual arousal, and that usually
leads to sexual desire and / or behaviour
1
,Reasons to not have sex
• Asexual: No sexual interest - sexual orientation
• Voluntary celibacy: Sexual desire, but refrain from acting on it
– Religious
– Morally (too young, not married, wait)
– Age
– No partner
• Involuntary celibacy: Want sex, but can’t get it (incel)
– Separation: partner in military, divorced, partner deceased, hospital, nurs-
ing home
• Age: Desire may decline, but doesn’t have to go away
• Disability: Not able to have romantic relationship
– Living with parents
– Shy
– No social skills
– Negative body image
2
,How do people have sex?
• Not
– Asexuality
– Voluntary celibacy (complete or partial)
– Involuntary celibacy (incel)
• Solitary sexual behaviours
– Sexual fantasy: any mental picture that comes to mind when you are
awake, that ultimately turns you on
Mental images that are arousing - concious control (not dreams)
Most common:
* Multipartner sex
* BDSM: bondage, discipline, dominance, submission, sadism and
masochism
* Novelty, adventure and variety
– Masturbation
• Partnered sexual behaviours
Sex is only sex if all partners consent. If there is no consent: sexual assault or
rape
• Kissing (not in all cultures)
– Signal of trust
– Checking partner
– Check health
– Promote health by exchanging bacteria
• Touching (tribadism)
• Oral sex (fellatio (penis) / cunnilingus (vagina))
Stimulation of genitals with the mouth
• Anal sex (intercouse or anilingus)
• Vaginal Intercourse (coitus)
Most common form
3
, How do people have coitus?
Four basic positions (most popular / best known)
• Man on top - missionary
• Woman on top - amazone / cowgirl
• CAT position - best for clitoral stimulation
• From behind - doggystyle
• Sideway - spooning
Baseball metaphor
1. Kissing
2. Touching above the waist
3. Touching below the waist
4. SEX
Former beliefs about sex
For centuries the idea has been that sex is:
• Heterosexual penis-vagina coitus
• Where the man has an orgasm (woman don’t)
• Within a monogamous relationship (preferably marriage)
• With the aim of reproduction
4
May 2021
Lecture 1 - Introduction
Three perspectives on sexuality
1. Biological: we all have a body
2. Social and Cultural Psychological: we all grow up in a cultural and social set-
ting
3. Applied Clinical: a sexual relationship can go wrong
Sex - Computer metaphor
Hardware Biology
Operating system Evolution
Software Social environment and culture
Helpdesk Sexologist
Table 1: Sex - computer metaphore
Definitions
• Sex(uality): Sexuality is about all sensory perceptions, emotions and cogni-
tions that someone associates with physical sexual arousal, and that usually
leads to sexual desire and / or behaviour
1
,Reasons to not have sex
• Asexual: No sexual interest - sexual orientation
• Voluntary celibacy: Sexual desire, but refrain from acting on it
– Religious
– Morally (too young, not married, wait)
– Age
– No partner
• Involuntary celibacy: Want sex, but can’t get it (incel)
– Separation: partner in military, divorced, partner deceased, hospital, nurs-
ing home
• Age: Desire may decline, but doesn’t have to go away
• Disability: Not able to have romantic relationship
– Living with parents
– Shy
– No social skills
– Negative body image
2
,How do people have sex?
• Not
– Asexuality
– Voluntary celibacy (complete or partial)
– Involuntary celibacy (incel)
• Solitary sexual behaviours
– Sexual fantasy: any mental picture that comes to mind when you are
awake, that ultimately turns you on
Mental images that are arousing - concious control (not dreams)
Most common:
* Multipartner sex
* BDSM: bondage, discipline, dominance, submission, sadism and
masochism
* Novelty, adventure and variety
– Masturbation
• Partnered sexual behaviours
Sex is only sex if all partners consent. If there is no consent: sexual assault or
rape
• Kissing (not in all cultures)
– Signal of trust
– Checking partner
– Check health
– Promote health by exchanging bacteria
• Touching (tribadism)
• Oral sex (fellatio (penis) / cunnilingus (vagina))
Stimulation of genitals with the mouth
• Anal sex (intercouse or anilingus)
• Vaginal Intercourse (coitus)
Most common form
3
, How do people have coitus?
Four basic positions (most popular / best known)
• Man on top - missionary
• Woman on top - amazone / cowgirl
• CAT position - best for clitoral stimulation
• From behind - doggystyle
• Sideway - spooning
Baseball metaphor
1. Kissing
2. Touching above the waist
3. Touching below the waist
4. SEX
Former beliefs about sex
For centuries the idea has been that sex is:
• Heterosexual penis-vagina coitus
• Where the man has an orgasm (woman don’t)
• Within a monogamous relationship (preferably marriage)
• With the aim of reproduction
4
