Evaluate the idea that spoken interactions between men and women are characterised by miscommunications.
Miscommunications can be defined as not communicating adequately or effectively, therefore the idea that men and
women’s interactions are characterised by these suggests that the two genders are not compatible in conversation.
This can be due to reasons such as women having inferior features in their language or men having a desire to
dominate and take over.
One argument as to why there are miscommunications in language is that women have inferior language. Lakoff
proposed the deficit model which suggests there are distinguishable features of women’s language that would not
be found in that of a man. For example women use empty adjectives such as ‘lovely’ that carries little meaning and
can be hard to interpret objectively; thus leading to miscommunications. The model proposes that women also use
indirect language, for example using epistemic modality and question intonation on the end of statements, this can
cause miscommunications because it causes a lack of clarity and certainty. The deficit model suggests that women
use tag questions which demonstrate their uncertainty and desire for approval in conversation, they need
confirmation on what they’ve said to assure themselves they have solidarity with the person they are talking to.
However, Fishman proposed that questions are an attribute of interactions and don’t show weakness at all. Instead
she believed that women use tag questions because they are genuinely interested in conversation and want to invite
response and encourage elaboration, this demonstrates the power of questions, rather than suggesting they are a
gateway to miscommunications.
Furthermore it is worth considering that many of the inferior features identified by Lakoff will not be the case for all
women, and context is very important. On the TV programme ‘The Apprentice’ women can be seen in the
boardroom using incredibly direct language that is free from empty adjectives and tag questions or hedges. This
suggests that it is not general interactions between men and women that would be characterised by
miscommunications, but rather it depends on what men and what women – who they are and what other parts of
their identity are important.
The second reason why inter-gender communication is said to be characterised by miscommunications is that men
are constantly interrupting in mixed sex conversation. Lakoff proposed the dominance model which says that whilst
men use conversation to exert power and dominate, women are much more subservient. This difference reflects
how men and women are used to living in society and leads to polarised uses of language. For example women’s
subordinate role causes them to use hedges such as ‘sort of’ whereas men will use three part exchanges to exert
power and show authority. These contrasting roles in conversation no doubt lead to miscommunications.
Zimmerman and west found that in mixed sex conversation, 96% of interruptions are men to women, showing that
they are eager to take over and say what they want to say unimpeded. However Geoffrey Beattie argued against
this, suggesting that one volatile man could have a disproportionate effect on the results and furthermore
interruptions don’t have to mean an attempt to dominate but can show excitement in the conversation. His own
research found that there was more or less an equal ratio of interruptions.
However, research like this is rarely quoted compared to studies that have found a gender difference. Deborah
Cameron suggested that studies which find similarities or no differences between the language of men and women
are less likely to be published because they are less interesting and controversial, and if they do get published they
receive much less attention. She believes that our need to find differences between language used by men and
women causes us to exaggerate differences which then creates a distorted picture which can often be misleading.
Miscommunications between men and women also come from the fact that they have different goals in
conversation that are not compatible. Tannen proposed the difference model which highlights six key contrasts
between male and female language. These include status and support, where men are competitive whilst women
seek solidarity an advice and understanding, where women use conversation to vent whereas men see these
complains as a challenge. In addition she compared their speech ‘Report and Rapport’ is where men speak one at a
time whereas women talk too much and overlap. Jenifer Coates described this overlap in women’s speech as
‘jamming sessions’ where they amplify each other’s ideas and bounce of one another. Where men and women see
conversation to mean such different things, this could make way for many miscommunications.
Miscommunications can be defined as not communicating adequately or effectively, therefore the idea that men and
women’s interactions are characterised by these suggests that the two genders are not compatible in conversation.
This can be due to reasons such as women having inferior features in their language or men having a desire to
dominate and take over.
One argument as to why there are miscommunications in language is that women have inferior language. Lakoff
proposed the deficit model which suggests there are distinguishable features of women’s language that would not
be found in that of a man. For example women use empty adjectives such as ‘lovely’ that carries little meaning and
can be hard to interpret objectively; thus leading to miscommunications. The model proposes that women also use
indirect language, for example using epistemic modality and question intonation on the end of statements, this can
cause miscommunications because it causes a lack of clarity and certainty. The deficit model suggests that women
use tag questions which demonstrate their uncertainty and desire for approval in conversation, they need
confirmation on what they’ve said to assure themselves they have solidarity with the person they are talking to.
However, Fishman proposed that questions are an attribute of interactions and don’t show weakness at all. Instead
she believed that women use tag questions because they are genuinely interested in conversation and want to invite
response and encourage elaboration, this demonstrates the power of questions, rather than suggesting they are a
gateway to miscommunications.
Furthermore it is worth considering that many of the inferior features identified by Lakoff will not be the case for all
women, and context is very important. On the TV programme ‘The Apprentice’ women can be seen in the
boardroom using incredibly direct language that is free from empty adjectives and tag questions or hedges. This
suggests that it is not general interactions between men and women that would be characterised by
miscommunications, but rather it depends on what men and what women – who they are and what other parts of
their identity are important.
The second reason why inter-gender communication is said to be characterised by miscommunications is that men
are constantly interrupting in mixed sex conversation. Lakoff proposed the dominance model which says that whilst
men use conversation to exert power and dominate, women are much more subservient. This difference reflects
how men and women are used to living in society and leads to polarised uses of language. For example women’s
subordinate role causes them to use hedges such as ‘sort of’ whereas men will use three part exchanges to exert
power and show authority. These contrasting roles in conversation no doubt lead to miscommunications.
Zimmerman and west found that in mixed sex conversation, 96% of interruptions are men to women, showing that
they are eager to take over and say what they want to say unimpeded. However Geoffrey Beattie argued against
this, suggesting that one volatile man could have a disproportionate effect on the results and furthermore
interruptions don’t have to mean an attempt to dominate but can show excitement in the conversation. His own
research found that there was more or less an equal ratio of interruptions.
However, research like this is rarely quoted compared to studies that have found a gender difference. Deborah
Cameron suggested that studies which find similarities or no differences between the language of men and women
are less likely to be published because they are less interesting and controversial, and if they do get published they
receive much less attention. She believes that our need to find differences between language used by men and
women causes us to exaggerate differences which then creates a distorted picture which can often be misleading.
Miscommunications between men and women also come from the fact that they have different goals in
conversation that are not compatible. Tannen proposed the difference model which highlights six key contrasts
between male and female language. These include status and support, where men are competitive whilst women
seek solidarity an advice and understanding, where women use conversation to vent whereas men see these
complains as a challenge. In addition she compared their speech ‘Report and Rapport’ is where men speak one at a
time whereas women talk too much and overlap. Jenifer Coates described this overlap in women’s speech as
‘jamming sessions’ where they amplify each other’s ideas and bounce of one another. Where men and women see
conversation to mean such different things, this could make way for many miscommunications.
