TTU ADRS 3329 Love-The Hungry Heart Lecture Slides

5/8/2017




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Love- Addiction and Relationships




the hungry heart




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Addictions

 All addictions:

 Attempt to control pleasure and pain by

 Alleviate boredom

 Promote a feeling of well-being

 Provide an escape from pain and sorrow




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Sex and Love Addiction
Weiss (2007):

 Love, sex and closeness bring anxiety and pain.

 Emotions:
 despair,
 fear of being alone and rejected,
 Longing for “special” relationship

 Cycle of desperation and loss

 Choice of partner becomes:
 “Will they leave me or not?”
 How can I get them to stay with me?”
 How intense is our sex life?”

 Unhealthy relationships= dependency, guilt and abuse.

 Sex and love addicts use seduction, control, guilt and
manipulation.




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, 5/8/2017




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Attachment theory


 Attachment theory
 Normal vs. overwhelming “attachment hunger”

 dependency bond broken:
 Prematurely
 Insensitively
 Sadistically

 Unhealthy attachment comes from:
 Dependency bond broken prematurely
 Growing up in a dysfunctional home
 Feelings of inadequacy
 Peer rejection




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Unhealthy Attachment
 Trace back to painful events—”wallflower”

 Few children can escape the after-effects of an unhealthy
interruption of the

 Predisposes them to become love addicts
 “living happily ever after”

 Overwhelming “Attachment hunger”




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Love Addiction

 Preoccupation:
 Person: Glen Close in “Fatal Attraction”
 Relationship:
 Two Types:(1) Can easily let go of their partner
BUT can’t see themselves as being without
someone, and (2) Cling to their partner no matter
what, even if they don’t love them.
 Romance: Addicted to the passion.




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