4 Common Divorce Fears (and
How to Cope)
You're not alone if you fear divorce. A few tips will help.
KEY POINTS
Many family law professionals will agree that fear overrides all other
emotions when it comes to divorce.
One of the most common fears during divorce is the fear of "starting
over."
If possible, avoiding litigation can reduce the stress and conflict of
divorce and give both individuals more control over the outcome.
The most common emotional reaction to an impending divorce is fear. Of
course, if you are facing a divorce, you are swimming in an emotional soup
of grief, anger, relief, worry, guilt, and many other feelings. But family law
professionals will say that fear overrides all the other emotions. In this post,
you’ll see that you are not alone. Suggestions for managing the fears are at
the end.
The four most common fears are the following:
The Children
Most divorcing parents fear damaging their children. Will they suffer in
school, socially, or from long-term mental health problems?
You might worry about the stigma the children may face. One child told me
that friends asked many times, “Who do you like better, your mom or your
dad?” You worry that your children will have to take sides.
Parents in high-conflict divorce worry that they will lose their children. They
fear that the children will align with one parent and reject the other. If a child
resists time with a parent, that parent fears that their ex is actively alienating
the child.
How to Cope)
You're not alone if you fear divorce. A few tips will help.
KEY POINTS
Many family law professionals will agree that fear overrides all other
emotions when it comes to divorce.
One of the most common fears during divorce is the fear of "starting
over."
If possible, avoiding litigation can reduce the stress and conflict of
divorce and give both individuals more control over the outcome.
The most common emotional reaction to an impending divorce is fear. Of
course, if you are facing a divorce, you are swimming in an emotional soup
of grief, anger, relief, worry, guilt, and many other feelings. But family law
professionals will say that fear overrides all the other emotions. In this post,
you’ll see that you are not alone. Suggestions for managing the fears are at
the end.
The four most common fears are the following:
The Children
Most divorcing parents fear damaging their children. Will they suffer in
school, socially, or from long-term mental health problems?
You might worry about the stigma the children may face. One child told me
that friends asked many times, “Who do you like better, your mom or your
dad?” You worry that your children will have to take sides.
Parents in high-conflict divorce worry that they will lose their children. They
fear that the children will align with one parent and reject the other. If a child
resists time with a parent, that parent fears that their ex is actively alienating
the child.
